NUR AFIFAH MUSTAPHA
Knowing me is so nothing. But to know each other in the world of blogging is the best we can do!
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e-mail & fb returned. but i'm sad.
written on Thursday, July 29, 2010 @ 1:43 AM ✈
"everybody, i'm back." dat is what i said in my so-called new facebook today. guys, at last, i got my fb back. yes, i feel so good right now. OMG, thank you.
aku lega. tapi aku x dapat tipu diri sendiri. ya, aku sedih sgt2 hari ni. wlaupun masalah aku dah selesai. tapi...hmmmm....now, while i'm writing dis entry, i keep wiping my tears. keep wiping again n again.
let me tell u the truth.
he sent me few messages today. he apologized. he told everything why he did those things to me. why he kept my email & fb as well. why and why and why and why. poor him. anyway, after all, it was not his fault overall. ALLAH knows the best to test him and us.
he was being too sad to let me go. he juz needs something to cheer his miserable life, that is ME. but then, we were both in an opposite lifestyle. hard for him, but harder for me. it is not a relief to see him sad and feeling bad. it is not a good thing to hurt someone nice like him(yes, he is nice. very kind towards me actually). and it is not a great day to leave him in his poor condition. these are all the reasons behind my tears right now.
now, knowing that i'm not his Mrs. Right, he let me go voluntarily. VOLUNTARILY. this word is also the reason why i drop a tear today.
thinking of what is he doing now? what he does to gain some improvements in his life? what kind of days he faces with my absence? is he good? is he ok? is he well-working? is he got a good food to be eaten? is his family in a good condition? Oh my God, i really feel guilty. guys, he comes from a quite poor family background. he got nothing. then how can i feel good about all these??? of course, again, because of that, i drop some tears.
u know, this is my bad. i have hurt someone that has nothing precious in his life. i might be don't mind if i hurt someone rich, great, brilliant, well-educate, knows religion well and so all so forth. but now it is him. a poor person, poor in every single thing. pity him. how could i stay in a comfort zone by hurting him??? again, that is why i cry and drop some tears today.
the main reason is, it is not easy for me to hurt a poor person like him. now, i feel so bad. but what else can i do. i'm just praying so that he can live his life in tranquil and harmony. (even without me. good luck jojoy!)
Labels: can i say, nobody cares for me like he did.
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e-mail & fb returned. but i'm sad.
written on Thursday, July 29, 2010 @ 1:43 AM ✈
"everybody, i'm back." dat is what i said in my so-called new facebook today. guys, at last, i got my fb back. yes, i feel so good right now. OMG, thank you.
aku lega. tapi aku x dapat tipu diri sendiri. ya, aku sedih sgt2 hari ni. wlaupun masalah aku dah selesai. tapi...hmmmm....now, while i'm writing dis entry, i keep wiping my tears. keep wiping again n again.
let me tell u the truth.
he sent me few messages today. he apologized. he told everything why he did those things to me. why he kept my email & fb as well. why and why and why and why. poor him. anyway, after all, it was not his fault overall. ALLAH knows the best to test him and us.
he was being too sad to let me go. he juz needs something to cheer his miserable life, that is ME. but then, we were both in an opposite lifestyle. hard for him, but harder for me. it is not a relief to see him sad and feeling bad. it is not a good thing to hurt someone nice like him(yes, he is nice. very kind towards me actually). and it is not a great day to leave him in his poor condition. these are all the reasons behind my tears right now.
now, knowing that i'm not his Mrs. Right, he let me go voluntarily. VOLUNTARILY. this word is also the reason why i drop a tear today.
thinking of what is he doing now? what he does to gain some improvements in his life? what kind of days he faces with my absence? is he good? is he ok? is he well-working? is he got a good food to be eaten? is his family in a good condition? Oh my God, i really feel guilty. guys, he comes from a quite poor family background. he got nothing. then how can i feel good about all these??? of course, again, because of that, i drop some tears.
u know, this is my bad. i have hurt someone that has nothing precious in his life. i might be don't mind if i hurt someone rich, great, brilliant, well-educate, knows religion well and so all so forth. but now it is him. a poor person, poor in every single thing. pity him. how could i stay in a comfort zone by hurting him??? again, that is why i cry and drop some tears today.
the main reason is, it is not easy for me to hurt a poor person like him. now, i feel so bad. but what else can i do. i'm just praying so that he can live his life in tranquil and harmony. (even without me. good luck jojoy!)
Labels: can i say, nobody cares for me like he did.
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we live under the same sky
“To put away aimlessness and weakness, and to begin to think with purpose, is to enter the ranks of those strong ones who only recognize failure as one of the pathways to attainment; who make all conditions serve them, and who think strongly, attempt fearlessly, and accomplish masterfully.”
- James Allen Quotes
Sometimes I wonder how people see me and what they think of me. It scares me a bit, honestly. I am sure though, that what they think of me,
what they think my life is, is a complete misperception. I have always tried to show myself as a carefree person, as someone who wont get bothered
because of public judgements. I am sure my friend and family think there is nothing going wrong in my life, that I do not worry enough, that
I am always happy. And I am sure they probably somewhat hate me for it because, lets admit it, there is nothing worse than seeing someone
who is life seems so perfect while yours is a complete mess. Truth is, I have become an expert at pretending. I think we are all experts
or at least we are getting there.
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my sunshine
links exchanged opened! just tag me but link me first
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link
coming soon....
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